new site

Please come and follow me on my new site http://thebarefootmarket.com/. It is full of design ideas, barefoot market items, a personal view into my home and of course some shared moments of my life as a wife and mother. I hope you guys enjoy the new site! Thanks

operation bedtime sneak

I hear it...The sound of little "sneaky feet" slowly approaching my doorway. I was about to speak when something inside me tells me to just let this one go and simply wait and watch. An image soon appears. Dressed in a cowboy hat, pajamas, holster and slippers he slinks over to my side of the bed...dinosaur flashlight and toy shotgun in hand.I now have to pull the sheets up over my mouth so he doesn't see me smiling. The light is pointed directly in my eyes to make sure that they are tightly shut.Yep...she's asleep. Now over to his Dad's side of the bed. The snoring should have been enough evidence to know that he was in the clear but no...Dad to must undergo the "light test". Now feeling safe he begins to set up camp on our couch. Suddenly the shotgun drops. Quickly he shines the light over to our bed to make sure the noise hadn't woken us up. No movement. He continues. After all the blankets, pillows, and stuffed animals are in place the light slowly dims and as it does I am able to detect a look of complete satisfaction in his face. Operation "Bedtime Sneak" completed.

Lord, I thank you for the security and comfort my son feels in my presence. I thank you for the true protection that only you can offer him. Lord I thank you for moments like this where my heart is filled with joy...filled with the joy that only comes by being a parent. Lord remind me to always cherish these things. Prepare me Lord for the moment when my mere presence is no longer enough to ease the worry and fear of my children. Fill them with your strength Lord as you continue to fill me. I love you Lord...amen

to be a woman

To be lost

To be found
To be here
To be there
To be needed
To be alone

To be held

To be freed

To be told

To be heard
To be complicated
To be understood

To be emptied

To be filled

To be high

To be low

To be weak 

To be strong

To be nurtured

To be liberated

To be yours

To be hers

strong will

There is no way that anyone could have prepared me in the “art” of parenting a strong willed child. It is…I’m sure…a skill not many have mastered...due in part to the reluctance of the “subjects” willingness to be molded any way shape or form. Recently as I was crying out to God to make a change in my child’s heart…to help him to be more obedient to see how his behavior was effecting me…my prayers were suddenly silenced by my son barging into the room shouting at the top of his lungs. Without thinking I immediately scolded him. I mean couldn’t he see I was in meditation with the Lord? It was then that I realized that it was time to start praying for a change in me. I prayed then that God would soften my heart and guide me towards a new way of thinking.

Soon after this occurred I received a phone call from my Mom. Some how, along the conversation we began discussing my son. She then started to tell me about a program she had watched about “strong willed children”. After the phone call ended I immediately went to my computer and started researching. As I read a certain feeling of relief and a new burst of confidence came over me. We could do this! We could make the changes necessary in our family to give us all what we truly wanted and needed in the end…to finally be heard. 

I do want to share some of the information that I have gleaned from some of the articles and book suggestions that I came across. These of course have become stepping stones for me...not a paved path. I do not in anyway believe that there is one set form of parenting that the entire world should follow. I am obviously not an expert but just another weary traveler walking down this long and bumpy road of parenthood. I know many of you have already set your coarse and have established what works for you...but I feel like our journey...my families journey...has just begun and who knows what lies ahead for us. What has become important for me is to remain confident in what we are enforcing, and to make sure that we are seeing positive results in the lives of our children...and if any of this does not seem to be falling into place...we will adapt...redirect...and find another way back to the path that God has lovingly laid out for our family.

 

 Parenting Your Strong-Willed Child

 Shaping Your Strong-Willed Child 

The Journey of a Strong-Willed Child

Characteristics of a Strong-Willed Child

The New Strong-Willed Child

Love and Logic 

• Act without frustration or anger
• Stop using threats and repeated warnings
• Set a Limit once
• Make statements you can enforce
• Give kids a healthy sense of control

and so I pray...Lord I pray for strength...always I pray for strength. I pray for wisdom...always I pray for wisdom. I pray for grace...always I pray for grace. I pray Lord...and you answer...always you answer. Thank you Lord. Amen 

gleaning the fields

As a young mother I have felt it so necessary to glean as much information as I could from other women that are going through or have gone through the season of life that I now find myself in. I have really been encouraged by a blog I have been following for awhile now and wanted to share with a little something I gleaned from it. It discusses the idea of the "Mission of Motherhood" in such an amazing way. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

Q & A’s for Mission-Minded Families: MOTHERHOOD

Tip #1 – Be confident in God’s calling.

“The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.”
Motherhood is a vital calling, envisioned in the heart of God. By God’s grace, it can be a position of influence and a sacrificial place of leadership in our society. It’s SO big . . . However, the tricky part of the call, is that most women don’t realize the possibilities and they don’t seriously train themselves for the job. Most mothers (even Christian moms) get so discouraged in the position (because they’re too concerned about what others think about “wasting” their gifts and intelligence), or they get so bored (because they don’t realize or “tap into” the kingdom-advancing possibilities).

With motherhood comes an anointing and a GRACE for each child and each day. God has this for you, but you have to receive it from Him. By your own efforts and strengths, motherhood can get ugly; but praise God, you’re NOT by yourself. Motherhood is not about making you look good, it’s about glorifying God and making Him look good. It’s not about making kids happy, but about training them to be holy. Your days may seem mundane and unimportant, but motherhood is a high and holy calling.
“If God calls you to be a mother, don’t stoop to be a queen!”
I do have a few thoughts regarding work outside of the home, especially if you have young children. If you’re feeling a longing to go back to work, ask yourself to honestly evaluate your motivating reason. Is it fear? Discontentment? Boredom? Personal esteem? Just needing a break from the kids? Is your desire to work a true need for additional income, or could God give you other ideas to live with less . . . Or to make money from home? In my opinion, a full-time stay-at-home mom can raise the standard of living for the whole family, more than any job. God has called us as mothers to “mother” our children. It’s not a job for a professional . . . Or for your mother-in-law.

Tip #2 – Be consistent.

As a mom, be consistent in discipline. Be the mom. Training kids for God is a big deal and a holy responsibility. We’re training our children to live with the understanding of both the LOVE of GOD and the FEAR of GOD in their lives. The way we parent will give our kids a reflection of who God is. When God says something He means it. When He gives an instruction, it’s important. He’s not fair (in the way we view fairness); but He is just and good. We need to reflect the heart of God as our child’s parent. And as wives, we need to let our husbands be the leaders.
I saw a mom with a screaming kid. “If you stop screaming, I’ll give you a candy.” OH MY!!! NO!!!
Nip it in the bud, and please be a consistent mother to your 2yr old. Training little ones is so much easier than trying to undo bad decisions in the teenage years.
With teenagers, be the mom, not the buddy. When they’re in junior high, begin to establish WITH your kids what God’s plans and purposes are for their lives. It’s BIG stuff. Don’t back down. And seek God’s help every day. Look to other families and older teens who are good examples. Seek other family friends who can “echo” your godly counsel. See the big picture, and help discipline and train your child, like a LIFE-COACH, to help them accomplish all that God has for this season. Hold tight when they’re little, then begin to let go as they get older. See the long-term target, and get your kids to see it too!

Tip #3 – Guard the gates of your home.

As a mom, be on-guard at the gates of your home. Your home is GOD’S kingdom headquarters in an enemy territory. You need to guard the eye gate and the ear gate. Guard your thoughts and guard your kid’s thoughts. Take every bad thought — discouragement, lie, fear, worry, temptation, bad attitude — CAPTIVE to the obedience of Christ! Guard against media, movies, evil influences (like demonic cartoons, games or horoscopes, books, or toys), fleshly printed material (women’s magazines, romance books, chick-flicks, bad-influence friends). One thing I’ve found is to stop JUNK on day 1, at the very door of your home. Don’t give evil or slight compromise a foothold (it won’t get easier if you let things “slide” for a while). The family lives to please God, not to please us as parents (or to make us look good), and not to please the kids. Your home is a sanctuary, and a retreat center, and a discipleship training school. Don’t “punish” your kids by grounding them to stay home, or to punished by sending them to their rooms.  Don’t you want your kids to LOVE being home with you?

Tip #4 – Mother by faith, not by fear

As a mom, be a warrior, not a worrier. Parent in FAITH, not fear!!! Release your kids to God, and to GOD’S purposes. Be passionate about raising kids for God, but don’t take more “government” than God requires. Do your battle in prayer: and wrestle against principalities and powers (identify your enemies, like  strife, rebellion, sin, or laziness). Your kids are not your enemy, and neither is your spouse. Take your concerns & spouse disagreements to a higher authority — GOD– and Pray!!!
Also, realize that as your kids get older, HORMONES are your friends, not your enemy. They are created and designed by God to help our children desire to find God’s life partner. Don’t fear the teenage years, but help your kids to bring their feelings and desires under God’s control.

Tip #5 – Rely on God’s GRACE!!!

Just live in God’s grace, and abide with Him. See this ABIDING MOM vs. SUPER MOM chart.
Don’t follow anyone else’s packaged-parenting-plan, and don’t put yourself on a guilt trip if you don’t measure-up to what’s working for other mothers. Yes, be willing to learn and to receive counsel and to get  organizational ideas — but seek God’s unique divine guidance for each day. If you’re needing advice with a particular area in your mothering, get help; but if something doesn’t work for your family and your personalities, whether that’s a home schooling curriculum, or a meal plan, or a cleaning schedule, or a devotional plan, or a sit-down corporate regular family Bible study plan, just relax!!!
And let your husbands be the men they are called to be (which might mean not always talking or trying to get your way and wanting to implement all your ideas.  You don’t have to be amazing; just walk with God, and be faithful. Just be you (with God’s help), and be the unique family God has created you to be.
Raise your kids for God, and get ready to RELEASE your arrows to God’s destiny!

Post Author

This post was written by ADunagan who has written 8 posts on Passionate Homemaking.

Ann Dunagan is a longtime homeschooling mother of 7 (ages 10 to 24, with 4 graduates), an international speaker with Harvest Ministry, co-founder of orphan ministries in East Africa and India (caring for over 700 children), and author of several books including The Mission-Minded Family. With a passion for the Lord and the lost, Ann motivates families for world missions.

Related Posts

1. Mission Minded Motherhood
2. Mission of Motherhood: Chapter 1
3. Mission of Motherhood: Discipleship
4. Book Study: Mission of Motherhood
5. Mission of Motherhood: Servant Leaders

you are my sunshine...by Jonah Julius

You are my sunshine
Your heart loves mine
It makes me happy
To feel this way
You'll never know dear
How much I just love ya
Please don't take my Mama away....and she's so beautiful and I love her and she is wonderful and I love her because she is my sunshine...and I am her "son-shine" and she loves me so much I can't even believe it....

I am

I am a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, a hand to hold. I am a dancer a singer a teacher a comedian. I am a protector, a comforter an enforcer and friend. I am their memory keeper. I hide I seek I lead I follow. I will go as far as my child’s imagination will take me. I do this not because my life is small and without any greater meaning but because my life now means something greater to lives that are still small. I am anything and everything they need me to be. I am…a Mother.

a mother in the ministry

As a young child my life was often bombarded by expectations and surrounded by opinions. I often felt studied by people I would be introduced to. It seemed that because my Grandfather was the Minister at the Church my family attended and had been for many years this was to be...expected. I was well versed in the importance of "unoffensive" conversation. To protect an-others feelings while leaving myself open and vulnerable to their judgment and criticism.There was a point in my life where I became very bitter and resentful of the life that in my mind had been chosen for me.Only now as an adult have I been truly able to appreciate the value in the lessons I learned from my family and from the "standards" I was meant to uphold. I can see now how God was conditioning my heart for what was to come in my life...a continuation of life in the ministry.
From the beginning I knew of my husbands passion for the Camping Ministry. The reality of it in it's entirety was a bit overwhelming to me at first. I guess I saw myself back into the position I was in as a child. I understood what ministry could do to the families that were involved in it. I understood the kinds of sacrifices that we would be expected to make. I understood that the ministry is about so much more then what people see you doing on a daily basis...and now...I would find myself serving beside my husband in a ministry where the daily responsibilities and duties are even less understood.
 Although I love being the "Camp Managers Wife" AKA "Joel's Wife" the title really doesn't come with a clearer job description...however it does seem to come with it's own expectations. These undefined expectations often create a ministry that can be somewhat hard to navigate. I have gotten lost so many times in my life as I tried to find my own way...my own voice...my own role in a ministry I had been brought into. I do want to say that I feel incredibly blessed to be a part of the Camping Ministry and I am so grateful that my husband obediently followed where God wanted to lead him....even with my resistance. I thank God for the peace and contentment that I now feel in my heart knowing that this too is where he wants me to be. I continue to pray for God's guidance as I still am trying to find my way, my limits, and my place in this ministry. 
 Going back to my own childhood in the ministry I can remember the incredible load my Grandmother happily carried as "The Preacher's Wife". She was involved in...well... I think just about everything. Her day was full of volunteering, visiting, providing meals, providing support, and showing Gods love through her beautiful humble spirit. I will have to admit now that the fact that she was so loved and needed by many did not always bring me the amount of happiness perhaps it should have. I would cringe when I would hear another child call her Grandma....She was mine....and I didn't want to share her with...well...everyone. There were very few moments that I felt that I could truly say I had her all to myself. Perhaps it was my attitude that needed adjusted but the past experience has caused me to look at my own identity in the ministry and my identity outside of it. It has caused me to be more conscious and aware of what I allow into my life knowing that I can only hold so much and it has also caused me to always try to remember what I am not willing to let go of.
As a mother to two young children I feel that my most important ministry now is to love and nurture them the way that God has called me to. I have already witnessed in my life how quickly this ministry to my children can be neglected in sacrifice for another. I will confess that I have allowed this to happen more than I ever should have. I have been trying more and more to watch and to see just how my children are affected by their own little lives in the ministry. I am watching to see how they handle being "A Family on Call". How are they dealing with the sacrifices? Of course being their mother I want to protect and shield them from all that I can but how will I protect them from the judgment they may receive. Will I too teach them the art of unoffensive conversation as a means to avoid confrontation? Should I make them painfully aware of the "expectations" that have been set? I have started to realize just how different things look through the eyes of a parent in the ministry then the eyes of a child....and so I pray...
God, I thank you so much for this opportunity to serve. It has filled my life with so much joy. I thank you for your patience and your guidance. I thank you Lord for the strength of my husband and for his example. I pray Lord that you will continue to let me see where it is you want me to go. I pray Lord for my children. I pray for their protection. I thank you Lord for their resilience. I pray that you will continue to give me the wisdom I need to be a mother in the ministry...amen